I can't stop talking

A Poem by Neruda

2006-05-15T15:16:00.000-07:00

My friend (Sam) once pointed me to this poem by Pablo Neruda.
I can't resist putting it on my blog. Simple words.
But the last two lines are one that make the difference,
not the first two or any in the middle. Ain't it ?
--------------------------------------------------------------
Tonight I can write the saddest lines

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example,'The night is shattered
and the blue stars shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me sometimes, and I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is shattered and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight searches for her as though to go to her.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. Like my kisses before.
Her voide. Her bright body. Her inifinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my sould is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.

Pablo Neruda

Quest

2006-05-14T17:22:00.000-07:00

How often do you see the sky without a cloud ?
How often you feel that your words are too loud ?

Is there a feeling, words can never say out ?
Is there a pure heart, having no single doubt ?

- Raghav

Numb & Dumb

2006-05-13T20:49:00.000-07:00

Just watched Lucky Number Slevin (Bruce Willice, Morgan Freeman).
Cool stuff, not recommended for people nostalgic about violence.
Next weekend, da vinci code.
And then again the (un)lucky number. 666 ... returning.
The Omen, releasing on 6/6/6. How can I watch it on any other day ?

btw: (may be feeling sympathetic, or guilty for not coming with me for last several movies), ppl
committed to me much earlier that they will come to see 'da vinci code' on 19th. i was
surprised! and for the 6/6/6, i'm possesed. nomatter what, i will watch it on 6/6/6,
even if none of you join me, or even if i m the only person in the hall.

- Raghav

They

2006-05-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

They're coming, right here, as fast as an arrow.
And they give you no time, to trust on tomorrow.

I wish I could stop them all, right there, in my head.
As, once you let them in, tomorrow is no far from dead.

- Raghav

Hap and happiness

2006-05-11T15:44:00.000-07:00

I was always assuming that the word "happiness" in English, means the following:
(In CancerWEB's Online Medical Dictionary :)
- Highly pleasant emotion characterised by outward manifestations of gratification; joy.

I was amazed to see how happiness originates from "luck" (hap).
Good to know it is that simple!

(On dictionary.com)
hap·py Audio pronunciation of "happiness" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (hp)
adj. hap·pi·er, hap·pi·est

1. Characterized by good luck; fortunate.
2. Enjoying, showing, or marked by pleasure, satisfaction, or joy.
3. Being especially well-adapted; felicitous: a happy turn of phrase.
4. Cheerful; willing: happy to help.
5.
1. Characterized by a spontaneous or obsessive inclination to use something. Often used in combination: trigger-happy.
2. Enthusiastic about or involved with to a disproportionate degree. Often used in combination: money-happy; clothes-happy.

[Middle English, from hap, luck. See hap.]happi·ly adv.
happi·ness n.

Synonyms: happy, fortunate, lucky, providential
These adjectives mean attended by luck or good fortune: a happy outcome; a fortunate omen; a lucky guess; a providential recovery. See also synonyms at glad1

[Download Now or Buy the Book]
Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Going on

2006-05-10T15:39:00.001-07:00

Laughing, crying, slipping and falling.
Losing, missing, faking and lying.
Neither to complain nor to look down.
The life is valiant to go on and on.

- Raghav

The falling sky

2006-05-09T16:31:00.000-07:00

lightenings and thunders
don't mean that the sky
was mad at you for long
and now making you cry.

it is the nature which falls
and your nature must be true
not to run away from the sky
as it will never fall on you

- Raghav

la la la

2006-05-08T20:18:00.000-07:00

la la la la la la la
la la la la la la la
la la la la la la la
...
this is how my iPod
battery went off today :(
sorry, nothing else to tell,
till it gets fully charged.

- Raghav

Navy Pier Rocks

2006-05-07T14:43:00.000-07:00

I was such a fool not to visit Navy Pier in almost 2 years of my stay in Chicago.
On last friday, again my plans for going to MI3 were brought down by the sheer
enthusiasm of my friends. (nobody had time, not their fault) and then all of a
sudden I got a surprise call from my friend. She just said, "Beware! I am coming tomorrow."
And then, the saturday was rocking!

Watched MI3 in the evening after having great time in Navy Pier and Devon Street(Indian Town).
The boat ride was especially good. It was pretty warm on land, but just after going a mile or two inside the michigan lake, the temperature became 12 degree F (-10 C). and as the boat-man said,
I could feel each of those 12 degrees. You can't imagine how cold lake michigan is.
Then at the end they took us with arnd 50 miles/hour speed.
That was amazing, like flying on damn cold water. I was impressed.

The view from the boat of the sears was too great. The boat went throguh Chicago river and
the man told us a lot of historical and facts about the architechture of the city. Never knew
that Chicago is the architechtural capital of U.S. Earlier I just used to think why the hell
all buildings here are so tall in this windy city. The sears oscillates a feet because
of winds but there are some buildings which are comparably tall but dont shake an inch!
(believing the man who was narrating on the boat.)

Overall MI3 was disappointing as expected. But not bad either, esp with Cruise and the background
music. Now waiting desperately for "da vici code", must be good since the master (Tom Hanks) is there. Want to go first day first show. (as I usually did esp for Matrix)
The movie is releasing on May 19. Anyone coming ?

- Raghav

Hope

2006-05-05T14:59:00.000-07:00

Hallucination Of Paradise Entrance
Harassment On Poor Emotions
Highly Obsessive Provoking Entertainment
Hardly Offers Perfect Ending

thats hope.
but still
Hang On Patiently Expecting ... (nothing)

- Raghav

Quotes again

2006-05-04T17:01:00.000-07:00

Fun:

The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a window.
-- Robert Paul

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour.
Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S relativity.
- Albert Einstein

Giving up smoking is easy...I've done it hundreds of times.
- Mark Twain

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde

Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's
the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!
-- Robert Orben

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
- Bertrand Russell
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Advice quotes

I always advise people never to give advice.
-- P. G. Wodehouse

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
-- Erica Jong (How to Save Your Own Life, 1977)

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
-- Wendell Johnson

Never miss a good chance to shut up.
-- Will Rogers

Today

2006-05-03T16:31:00.000-07:00

Today is no better than the previous day.
but today won't be worse than tomorrow.
Lots of todays and tomorrows may come,
but there is no 'yesterday' I could borrow.

- Raghav

Horizon

2006-05-02T15:17:00.000-07:00

Secretly silent, confining horizon,
but the beauty unseen is truely rare.
With inviting voice of world un-been,
it's inevitable for me to be right there.

- Raghav

Life is too slow ...

2006-05-01T21:09:00.000-07:00

Why the hell it seems like
the life is too slow ?
There is no single movement,
and there is no blow.

I hate crawling like snail,
I hate staring at the past.
I hate being so cautious,
love to be dangerously fast.

- Raghav

Horse

2006-04-30T16:49:00.000-07:00

Don't stop him nowhere,
let the horse run free.
Without the freedom of dreams,
horse can never cross the sea.

- Raghav

Quotes on Optimism

2006-04-29T15:44:00.000-07:00

Some people found my posts very pessimistic.
Another pessimistic attempt to be an optimist.

The basis of optimism is sheer terror.
Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900), The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1891

The place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum.
Havelock Ellis (1859 - 1939)

I find nothing more depressing than optimism.
Paul Fussell

The point of living and of being an optimist, is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come.
Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)

And the last one,
"A pessimist is the one who thinks it can't get worse,
and an optimist thinks that it can."

Is anyone coming ?

2006-04-28T15:03:00.000-07:00

Is anyone coming with me,
I am going somewhere far.
In the middle of the ocean,
just to get a chocolate bar.

If that seems hard & stupid,
then can you come with me,
to the "C"-shop right there,
just to have a cup of tea.

(Sorry! Slightly out of context for ppl outside U of C.
btw: C-shop is a great place to get coffee and snacks
inside the campus.)

- Raghav

A Falling Leaf

2006-04-27T16:36:00.000-07:00

I feel little sorry for that lone falling leaf.
No one even there, to listen to its grief.

The tree is so lost, in dreams of new spring.
Leaves must fall, for the fresh joy to bring.

- Raghav

Strange

2006-04-26T20:30:00.000-07:00

Why do we end up saying something
which we never ever wanted to say ?
Why do we stress on hearing something
which we could never bear to hear ?

Why do we hurt the people whom you care most for ?
Why do we get hurt by them even after knowing
that they care for you most ?

Why do words become more important than feelings ?
Why do misunderstandings become more trustful than truth ?

Why do friends become stranger than a stranger ?
Why do I become best foe to my best friend ?

But when we meet again, sit for a while and smile,
all these questions suddenly disappear,
and the unbreakable bond is formed again ... 100th time
... though the conversation is more quiet than silence.

Strange, isn't it ?

- Raghav

Heartbreaker

2006-04-25T18:17:00.000-07:00

Again the trees are so green,
again the sky is so blue.
Again I'm falling for "her,"
& "her", I'm afraid is you.

Again I'm writing a song,
again the words seem so few,
Again I run out of "thoughts",
& "thoughts" are stuck at you.

Again I'm lost in nowhere,
again I'm dreaming so new,
Again my dreams've the "spell",
& the "spell" is magic of you.

Again I'm playing the game,
again I'm having no clue.
Again I'm fighting to "win,"
& "win" is nothing but you.

Again I'm badly in love,
again I've nothing to do,
Again "she" is making me mad,
& "she", why has to be you ?

Again my heart is afraid,
again I'm getting same view,
Again my heart will be broken,
but by myself & never by you.

- Raghav

Who has time ?

2006-04-24T12:58:00.000-07:00

Who has time to sit and chat ?
Who has time to run after rat ?
Who has time to sleep like a log ?
Who has time to read through my blog ?

- Raghav

busy

2006-04-23T20:28:00.000-07:00

since "action is eloquence."
i need time to do action, till then, no blogging.
enjoy the great music of silence.

- Raghav

"Action is eloquence" - W. Shakespeare

2006-04-22T16:46:00.000-07:00

Silence ... speaks what words never can.
" ... truely is the only language of soul."

but "the hardest of all arguments to refute."
still the purest of all conversations.

The best friend of the solitude.
Silence has no enemy at all.

The warmest of all regards I can offer.
The easiest of all paths to follow.

"Silence is golden."
But ... very true ... "action is eloquence" ... ain't it?

- Raghav

Ship

2006-04-21T17:39:00.000-07:00

I feel like the captain of my sinking broken majestic ship.
I invited all my best friends on my ship and promised
an unforgettable voyage in the ocean of time. And
the voyage began keeping upto the promise. But then ...
how could I not see the tip of the iceberge ?

Then what followed was a disaster. None would have wanted
this in the cruelest of their dreams.
I lost almost all of my best friends.
And some just left me. They got mad at me. why should they not be ?
And why should I stop them ? It will be even more of devility.

I made futile efforts to save each and every one of them.
But it was truely out of my control.
And now here I am. Standing alone on my majestic ship.
Remembering each and every great moment of the aweful voyage.
Waiting for it to sink deep inside the great ocean of time.

- Raghav

Just love me, me love you.

2006-04-20T11:33:00.000-07:00

I see you every day, and don't know what to say,
Then you take a turn, and I just change my way.

I see you smile at turn, I see you see me too.
I wonder what to do, just love me me love you.

I miss you after that, having no one to look at,
Then we meet again, in my dreams to have a chat.

With voice I never heard, you say me a word or two,
In magic of dreams so new, you love me me love you.

I wait and watch the clock, and maybe we'll never talk,
Then we meet by "luck", at each place where you walk.

You blame it on my heart, as I wish you love me too.
But not that you have to, just love me me love you.

- Raghav.

Cities in my heart

2006-04-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

(Not in any specific order.)

Chennai -
(I did my undergrad, so its like my hometown.)
Bad: I fell in love (hence got hurt) with lots of things there,
for example auto drivers.
Good: Still affectionate.
Going again: I would like to go there again to enjoy the undergrad days.

Mumbai -
Bad: Bombay stinks.
Good: Still glamourous and fast.
No direct affection yet.
Going again: I would not mind going there again.

Paris -
Bad: Eifel Tower is the ugliest place in Paris,
thats the only "bad" comment about the city.
Good: Most romantic place on earth I have ever visited.
Going again: I can't wait longer to go there again.

Bergen (Norway) -
Bad: Too costly.
Good: Rains everyday, too beautiful.
Going again: I have to marry a rich girl.

Boston -
Bad: Too far from Chicago.
Good: Cool, warm and young.
Going again: Sure. Why not?

New York -
Bad: I am not staying in New York.
Good: My "heart" lives there. Hotdog. Times square.
I don't need to tell about NY.
Going again: Come on, how can I not?

Orlando (Florida) -
Bad: I was there just a couple of days.
The hotel had alligators!
Good: City of sun and city of fun.
Going again: Definitely making plans.

Chicago -
Bad - I better say nothing.
Good - Hopefully I will be leaving before 4 more years.
Downtown is too good.
Going again - Do you mean do I plan to leave?
Definitely. But I won't.

City of Sun

2006-04-18T16:07:00.000-07:00

Darkness disappears
all of a sudden
As I enter the city of sun
(to be continued ... )

Moving with the Speed of Light

2006-04-16T13:28:00.000-07:00

I got to go, never say no,
I must've left, a long ago.

I got to fly, never do cry.
How'll it go, let me just try.

I got to dream, and I ought to fight.
I got to to fly with speed of light.

Nothing to choose, and nothing to lose,
Time comes for me, to be on my cruise.

Again I'll say, I'm moving miles away,
To make things better, day after day.

I got to do, what I feel is right.
I got to move with speed of light.

You got to trust, or it will be worst,
I'll never forget you, listen to me first.

I see the star, asking "where you are?"
Waiting for myself, twinkling so far.

I got to embrace the star so bright.
I got to travel with speed of light.

I feel new spring, having blessings to bring,
I can see your smile, and I can hear you sing.

Why to be upset, if world is so great,
Nature tells all this, and I just translate.

I got to go to country of delight.
I got to go with speed of light.

- Raghav

World without :)

2006-04-15T19:51:00.000-07:00

When I walked with arrogance, in the world without "smile",
I felt like running my old program that does't even compile.
I thought, may be everyone I meet is waiting only for my exile,
I saw myself in mirror, no doubt, I was much better erstwhile,
No time it takes, may be just a single pause, isn't it worthwhile :)

- Raghav

You tell me, which one is better ?

2006-04-14T17:03:00.000-07:00

Isn't harmless solitude better than creating awful chaos ?
Isn't calm isolation better than malignant violence ?

Isn't speechless conversation better than unbearable abuse ?
Isn't pure silence better than inviting misunderstandings ?

Isn't thoughtless sleep better than unreal dreams ?
Isn't acceptance of the defeat better than futile hopes ?

Isn't living with no friends better than getting them into trouble ?
Isn't being cruel but helpful better than being kind but harmful ?

Isn't constructive action better than care for feelings ?
Isn't factual crawling better than imaginary leaps ?

Isn't being stronger and stronger better than always expecting weak opponent ?
Isn't conquering the world all alone better than crying in the corner by myself ?

- Raghav

A Confession

2006-04-13T14:28:00.000-07:00

I started it all myself,
no one else to blame.
Setting up tragic fire,
with serine calm flame.

The crime so mean, so cruel,
even I can't forgive me.
Bleeding by arrows of repent,
I'm waiting to cease to be.

Yes, she was still there,
to make me act so worse,
It's not she to accuse to,
but it's my eternal curse.

I trusted innocent truth,
in every word she spoke.
Now she leaves me far,
with promises that broke.

If you offer me, one more life to live,
I'd rather commit, the same old crime.
Why I loved her, though she hated,
I'd keep on loving, till the end of time.

- Raghav

Lake

2006-04-12T22:56:00.000-07:00

Thunders stopped, clouds move away,
what I see now, is that stagnant lake.
Feelings have ceased, doubts disappear,
but heart still feels, feelings were fake.

- Raghav

Journey

2006-04-11T18:56:00.000-07:00

While walking on the road, the strangers came so close.
Only misunderstanding was waiting, on every turn you chose.
You expect out of nothing, forgot to see the arrow.
And when you had to stop, the journey ends in sorrow.

- Raghav

Story of a Madman

2006-04-10T16:04:00.000-07:00

The lightening strikes,
making awful sounds.
Look at the madman,
he knows no bounds.

With eyes closed shut,
and hands on his ears.
He's crying so loud,
without any tears.

He feels no fear,
he senses no danger.
For him, everyone 'round
is just like a stranger.

Running through the crowd,
hurting everyone in his way,
he was never so ruthless,
what happened to him today?

Somebody stop him there,
alas, too late to call.
He is running so fast,
straight into the wall.

The madman vanished,
his madness is there.
I am afraid to see,
it drives me where?

- Raghav

Quotes

2006-04-09T19:22:00.000-07:00

My favourites from Shakespeare (From websearching. I have never read a book except
for a part of Hamlet which was in my undergrad syllabus.)

I must be cruel only to be kind,
thus bad begins, and worse remain behind.

I did never know so full a voice issue from so empty a heart:
but the saying is true 'The empty vessel makes the greatest sound'.

In time we hate that which we often fear.

So full of artless jealousy is guilt,
It spills itself in fearing to be spilt.
- "Hamlet", Act 4 scene 5

The worst is not
So long as we can say, "This is the worst."
- "King Lear", Act 4 scene 1

Excellent wretch! Perdition catch my soul,
But I do love thee! and when I love thee not,
Chaos is come again.
- "Othello", Act 3 scene 3

Some funny ones:
A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and
asks, "Did u miss a step?"
"No," he answers, "I hit every one of them!"
- Milton Berle

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today, they left
a little note on the windscreen, it said "Parking Fine", so that was nice.
- Tommy Cooper

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick
boxing.
- Emo Philips

What is there in name? ... R&J

2006-04-08T13:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, after hurriedly posting a poem on my blog, I went to watch R&J.
I had asked 10 people to join me. Some of them couldn't, some didn't want to and some
never replied. So, I had to go alone. I was a bit late. When I entered the theatre
with soda can, the organizer was on the stage telling people about the show.
I didn't find any place to sit. So, I got an extra chair and sat at the back.
This was the first time that I was watching a show alone, I was so excited about it.
Somebody came and told me that I was sitting near the fire exit and I should remove the chair.
While doing that I ended up spilling the drink on floor and made a mess. Now I felt that I should
leave, this is turning out to be terrible.

As soon as I started walking, the observant organizer asked the audiance: "Are there any chairs in which there are no butts yet? Please raise your hand if the chair besides you is empty." Two people raised their hands. One in the left corner and one in the right corner. Then she told me, "There you go buddy. Now you have to make a choice."
I was confused, still thinking of leaving, but the people started cheering. "Come on our side,
come on here." I was shocked. I took a pause for a while and then chose to go to my right.
"We won. We won.", the people on right side shouting in joy. I felt so great. When I was moving to the corner, everybody in the row was congratulating me. "You made right choice man," one guy told. I was so thrilled before even the start of the show. "Thus show is a success", organizer
was also happy. I thought might be all these people were listening to me while I was writing
my last post. Surprise!

The show was too great and I enjoyed it with everybody in my neighbourhood. I was shocked when
Romeo literally jumped out of the window which was besides me. The sword fighting seens were
breathtaking. The dialogues were difficult to understand but not the famous ones like
"What is there in name? The rose, if called by any other name will smell as sweet as ever."
"The love is blind ... ", and ends with "The sun of the sorrow is rising." After the drama
ended, the artists made a half circle and girls threw roses on Romeo, who was spontaneous to
give one to Juliet and she accepted it with her charming smile. One thing was
a bit strange to me that they called this show R&J instead of "Romeo and Juliet." Probably
thats the modern name, but isn't "Romeo and Juliet" more romantic than just "R&J." I guess I was
wrong, afterall, "What is there in name? ..."

- Raghav

I am not alone

2006-04-07T16:54:00.000-07:00

Don't tell I have no one to dance with,
I dance with my chaos,
which is always so rhythmic,
and sends me far across.

Don't tell I have no one to play with
I play with my childish thoughts,
which are alwyas so naughty,
and I laugh with them lots and lots.

Don't tell I have no one to fight with,
I fight with my anger,
which is always so tough,
but that makes me stronger.

Don't tell I have no one to talk to.
I talk with my silence,
which is alywas so calm,
to stop me at the fence.

Don't tell nobody listens to me.
My heart listens to my voices.
which is always so brave,
to break itself into pieces.

Don't tell that I am all alone.
I stay with my memories,
which are alwyas so fast,
help forget all my worries.

- Raghav.

The Heart in Blossom

2006-04-06T09:55:00.000-07:00

I promised somebody that today I won't write anything sad or stupid,
So blame it on Hugo. My first poem in french translated in English by my dear friend Anandam.
--------------
If you do not have anything to say to me,
Why do you come near me?
Why do you smile at me in such a way,
That would turn the king mad?
If you do not have anything to say to me,
Why do you come near me?

If you do not want to know me,
Why do you hold my hand?
In my angelic and tender dream,
About which you think on the way,
If you do not want to know me,
Why do you hold my hand?

If you want me to go away,
Why do you pass by here?
When I see you, I am thrilled:
It is my joy and it is my concern.
If you want me to go away,
Why do you pass by here?
---------------------------

to be or not to be thats his question

2006-04-05T13:40:00.000-07:00

how long should he live in past, past has already betrayed him. it's never coming again.
how long should he run away from future, future is so eager to hug him. it's unavoidable.
some things are not meant to work, some things are best to be forgotten, but unforgettable.
some things are good to remember, every day, every hour, every moment, but that doesnt work.
is that how one really feels, or just feels that he feels something like that.
is that what one really wants, or just wants that he wants something like that.
if the feelings are true, then why doesnt he forget the past, embrace the future.
if the feelings are fake, why does he care about past, ignoring the future.
perhaps he doesnt understand, that he is not the one, he is just another one.
perhaps he does understand, what he has lost, was never there with him.
no it cant be his dilemma, as he knows each and everything, there is no choice to make.
no it cant be his weakness, as it came out of his strenght, with the choice that he made.
he has tied himself, with the fragile ropes, which are so easy to break, yet making him helpless.
he has threatened himself, with the fear, that the bonds will be easily broken, setting him free forever.
why does he want to do all this, knowing that he is trapping himself.
why does he want to escape, if he himself wants to be there, be trapped.
no one can help him, neither u nor me nor himself, he has stopped listening, everything.
no one can save him ... forget it, why do u care, no one will even remember him tomorrow.

- he

mission impossible

2006-04-04T15:55:00.000-07:00

deehzee threatens anandam: "if u cant beat us, join us."

the secret mission begins ...

who is being shot next?

computer at work ... breaking the code.

mission successful! cheers ...

a perfect plan!

well ... not quite!

dont try to hit me and hit me

2006-04-04T15:38:00.000-07:00

trial for uploading photos

my first poem in french

2006-04-03T19:55:00.000-07:00

Si vous n'avez rien a me dire,
Pourquoi venir aupres de moi?
Pourquoi me faire ce sourire,
Qui tournerait la tete au roi !!

translation:

if u didnt have to say me a single thing,
then why did u look at me like that?
and why did u smile in such a way,
which will turn thousands of kings mad!!

- obviously not me.

fun part is that i had impressed my advisor in paris with this one.
he believed that i composed this poem myself just after learning
"bon jour!", "merci boque!".
i really did it myself. believe it or not.

au revoir.

one thing missing

2006-04-02T21:04:00.000-07:00

finally it rained today, quite heavy, with lightening. hope for spring.
i was home after watching a movie "16 blocks" (bruce willice). movie was cool.
i got wet by the time i reached home from the bus stop. feeling little cold.
wanted to get warm. and then there was an inevitable thought ... how about a tea.
masala chai. i couldnt resist myself to go to the teabags i have at home,
i have not used them for long, but then i realize that i didnt have milk and considering how
lazy i m, i just ditched the thought and instead thoughts started coming.

i always was a big fan of this hot beverage. i get jealous of coffee fans.
in chennai i had hard time, though there was "sp tea" (sp stands for special)
to console. there is no comparison to the tea given at the roadside shops (of the size
much smaller than a bathroom). i always wondered how did those two people and that
kid went inside, there is no door to this shop, may be they enter through the window.
but the man is too fat to do that. may be they r there forever, at least whenever
i saw them, i never saw them going in or coming out.

but the shop is amazing, u get everything there though it is just a tea shop.
and the radio. probably other people used to be too busy in the their hot discussion
till their tea becomes cold, and then they used to leave, but i always liked the songs on the radio. the cup of tea and the song of mukesh on the radio is a perfect combination
to get fresh. it just costs 2-3 bucks (Rs) ... too cheap for its value. and the man doesnt
take any tips.

this is one of my dreams for long. i should open a tea shop. just like that one.
with the radio. i tried to fulfilled my dream by opening a tea/coffee shop in chennai
in the student lounge of our institute. but i had more friends than the tea bags. so
i went into loss. i never mind even that. just for my beloved ... masala chai.
thats one thing i m missing right now.

- raghav

knock knock

2006-04-01T17:08:00.000-08:00

knock knock ... check ur mail,
a greeting is coming
from someone interesting
and naughty and charming

dont say i didnt tell
hey dude, dont open, be wise today
u r holding it wrong
"!loof lirpa", is that what they say?

check out www.google.com/romance/
if u havent yet.
try making a profile.
pretty cool.

- raghav

dream

2006-03-31T12:39:00.000-08:00

i had another horrible dream yesterday night.
i started hating the things that i like.
i started liking the things that i hate.
i turned into a villain ... a bad man.
i wanted to destroy the whole world.
i dont know excatly, why.
probably i was angry with everyone ... everyone in the world, except myself.
i was fighting ... with my devilish sword.
fighting with everyone ... without any mercy.
i was enjoying being a devil for long ... till the time came.
the end. villain must die.
all of a sudden i lost all my powers.
i could sense nothing but the fear.
the dream was to end as it was meant to be.
... and i was awakened.
now i was no longer the devil in the dream.
but i could feel the same fear ... directly from my own heart.
i started searching for my sword ... i never found it.
i was to cry ... but no ...
just gave a sigh ... relief ... thank god! i dont have the sword with me.

- raghav

zelupz

2006-03-30T10:20:00.000-08:00

noinnect lionisul
cerfpet runmuncod
ceptidelevy smilep

hastt flie!

nothing

2006-03-29T18:33:00.000-08:00

i dont feel like writing anything on my blog today.
i have a quiz tomorrow, i need to study but i m not.
i think i have a good memory, so good that i cant forget some things.
nothing has happened to me, still i m stopped.
i m doing nothing. literally nothing. just sitting and sometimes putting my iPod buds in my ears,
i dont know even a single song i listened to but surely i listened to many since the battery is down.

i talked to the bus driver on the way to school. he was so happy and made me happy for a while.
he is my friend. he asks me to sit on the first seat every time so that i can talk to him.
he told me today that he knows COBOL, PASCAL and C (and he thinks that i also know all
these since i m doing PhD in computer science) and still he ended up on this job.
but still he said he is happy. because his wife makes sandwich for him and all he has to do
is to rotate the hands throughout the day. i discussed some of my research with him. he is
a good advisor. he gave me some advice. probably it will help me do good research.

i dont think i lack motivation. i m just not doing it for the sake of not doing it.
i feel challenged by my friend, it's good, and i will have something more to tell to him
next time. and probably i will have answer to his question.
now i should go, i will prepare overnight for the quiz and forget the rest.
sorry, for such a bad post, but i really did feel like posting nothing.

- raghav

... walking into the darkness

2006-03-28T17:42:00.000-08:00

i can't see my friends ... may be they are too far.
i can't see anybody ... may be no one is there.
i can see the light fading away ... slowly.
i am going ... somewhere far.
i can't see the destination ... may be it's not reachable.
i can hear only the silence ... too loud.
what i can see is the darkness ... too bright.
i am walking into it ... with hundreds of fears.
wait a second ... strangely the darkness is not stranger anymore.
i should stop ... no i can't.
i am walking further ... with thousands of fears.
how is this possible ... the darkness is me !
i realize now ... it's my own shadow.
how can that be ... millions of fears enter.
and why am i so afraid ... to walk into the darkness of my shadow.
it will always be with me ... whether i reach the destination or not.
it will always be frightening ... whether i see it or not.
i don't want the darkness ... i dont want to walk.
but i cant stop walking ... untill my shadow merges with the eternal darkness
... leaving me fearless.

- raghav

My first attempt: failing again

2006-03-27T20:26:00.000-08:00

Not Special Anymore

i was so special to someone
whom i liked my best
so much and so bad
that i forgot all the rest

yes, i went mad
when she used to just smile
why did things change
i think for a while

no longer i am special
neither can i be
some things don't work
why to yell at thee

it was just a dream
a soothening feather
voices within say
i ought to forget her

memories remain
bound by the rope
i still trust on
my dying hope

waiting forever
to hear her voice
what else can i do
i have no choice

- raghav

Do u like me ? Do u hate me ? Or u dont care ?

2006-03-27T16:02:00.000-08:00

Three things that I like:
one: chaos and paradox
two: surprises
three: myself

Three things that I hate:
one: dreams
two: hope
three: me.

Three things that don't matter to me:
one: reality
two: consequences
three: I

- solely me.

I want to hit someone with my blog

2006-03-13T21:42:00.000-08:00

On how this blog was created.

After a weekful of motivation from one close friend, I agreed that I should have a blog too.
My friend was kind enough to create this beautiful blog for me. Infact my friend was too generous, the pink color in the background was chosen by my friend and also the first posting was done by my friend to save my efforts for the first day. I am really thankful to my friend for all this help. I hope my friend will keep on helping me like this in future.

Purpose of this blog.

This blog has no purpose.
The only potential purpose the blog can have is to be used as an object to hit someone.
So, stay away from this blog, you might get hurt.
Though, considering some recently arrived changes in my life, this blog might end up
doing some constructive work for me. Who knows, lets see.

I want to impress somebody with my blog

2006-03-13T15:12:00.000-08:00

Welcome to my blog. Please, have some coffee.